Thin Places: Where faith and life meet

Rest (1 of 5) - Do you need to rest?

'Morning Lilies' (C) Malcolm Duncan. Taken at Angkor Wat, February 2013.

"Rest" (This is the text of a message I brought on my visit to Cambodia in February, 2013.)

Do you need to rest?

There are 168 hours in a week. We can either ionvest them or spend them, but the one thing that we cannot do is save them. Although we like the idea of 'saving time', it is actually an impossibility. So many of us, perhaps all of us (if we are ruthlessly honest) try to cram far more into those 168 hours than we should. The result is we end up not only burning the candle at both ends, but we also burn it the middle. With so much candle-burning going on, it is not a surprise that we end up feeling 'burned out'.  Exhasution, overwork and stress and are all far too common for people who lead churches, run mission agencies or work for N.G.O's. Of course, I know that the tendency to over-work can be seen far and wide across society and across our churches, but many of the people that 'answer a call' to work in an overseas context also end up working far too hard. If they are not careful, they do all the right things for all the right reasons, but they do them in their own strength. Whether it flows from an old-fashioned (and very unhelpful) Protestant work ethic which drives them into the ground or it flows from an over-inflated ego and the need to be the 'hero', the results are the same - emotional and physical burn-out. There are many indicators that you are overworking, let me highlight just six. Ask yourself if you are suffering from any of these.

1. Irritability: Things that you could absorb and pass off as unimportant just six months ago now leave you short-tempered. You find yourself snapping at those who are closest to you and losing patience with people who need longer to do something or to process things. You are abrasive, difficult to work with and unsympathetic.
2. Vulnerability: You are vulnerable to doing things that you know are wrong. That might be in areas of personal conduct, ethics, morals or in your work. You are more tempted to cut corners, to put up with shoddy work or to pass away your own mistakes as 'inevitable' whilst at the same tiem being hyper-critical of others.
   
3. Erratic Behaviour: Those around you, either at home or at work or both, do not know how they will find you. People around you are walking on egg-shells far more often than they used to and they are anxious about you will respond to them. In fact, you find yourself 're-acting' far more often than 'responding'. The difference being when you are re-active you don't stop to think about your actions.
4. Habitual Tiredness: You are tired all the time. When you wake up, you feel just as as tired, if not more so, than when you went to bed. You really struggle to make it through a day without feeling a real sense of exhaustion.
5. Loss of Perspective: You are focussing on small things whilst letting big things lie undone. You find yourself feeling paralysed by the choices you have to make and the things you have to get done to the extent that you often find yourself thinking or saying 'I just don't know where to start'. You are missing deadline after deadline and you feel like you are sinking in your work and that there is no way out.
6. Insecurity: You take criticism far too personally. You are hyper-sensitive to the things people say and you are finding yourself feeling more and more isolated, perhaps even paranoid, at what is going on around you. You think people are undermining you when they offer advice and you find your natural reaction to observations from others is one of self-defence.

What can I do?

If some of these (just one, actually) fits your behaviour right now, then it is very likely that you need to do something about your working / living blend and pattern. If you don't, you will end up sliding further and further down the slipway of overwork and you will either hurt yourself or those around you. This is not a game, it isn't inevitable and it is urgent that you do something about it.

Over the course of the next few posts, I will lay out, 'The Reason for Rest', 'The Rhythm of Rest', and 'The Result of Rest.' My last blog on the subject will draw some conclusions. I do hope you will find them helpful. Feel free to pass them on. I've decided to set them out in 5 posts so that they can be read in a more relaxed context - but the five posts flow from one into the other.

Remember, if you don't 'come apart' to get the right blend in your life, then you will eventually either fall apart of tear yourself and those you love apart.

 

 

Lessons in Generosity and Hospitality - Reflection 2 on my Visit to Cambodia

"Lunch in a Rural Cambodian Village" (Taken 2nd February 2013)

So today found me up with the lark and on the road out of Phnom Penh to minister to men and women who live in villages around 3 hours outside of the city. The journey there was full of fun, laughter and genuine fellowship as I shared my story with other pastors travelling with me and they shared their stories with me.

One had been controlled by evil spirits and his life had been blighted by struggle, sickness and poverty. His whole family had been gripped by fear and sadness and loss, then he met Jesus and everything changed! Since then he has been free from fear, and many of his family have come to know Christ. The sickenesses that he was afflicted with have been lifted and he is serving the Lord with great faith and passion. Another lost most of his family in the 'Killing Fields' yet has forgiven the killers and has come to faith in Jesus and is now reaching out to the very people who attacked him years ago. These are amazing trophies of grace.

 

Generosity embodied.

When we got the village, the whole community had gathered to hear the 'English' (!) preacher. We were met with beautiful fresh coconuts, served a lavish lunch (see picture) and honoured in so many ways. I preached on 2 Corinthians 1:10 and encouraged those present to remember that God had delivered them, was delivering them and would deliver them. They had been set free from the penalty of sin, were given power over sin and would one day be freed from the very presence of sin. We had a wonderful time of fellowship and celebration together.

What has struck me here, as in so many other countries I have visited to minister, is the utter kindness and generosity of the people. They have so very little, yet give so much away. The lunch is just an example. The best chickens prepared for us. Beautiful dressings for more rice than I have ever seen (the Khmer people have rice with everything!). Fish caught and delicately prepared. Noodles, dips, bottles of water, coconut. The table cleaned and set out especially. The room pristine and ready for  respectful hearing of God's word. 

It's more than just food and clean rooms though. The generosity and hospitality of the people here is seen in their welcome, their love, their attitude, their smile. You feel it when they greet you. You sense it when they give you a glass of water. They want you to know you are welcome. They aren't being legalistic, doing something because they have to. They are being generous because they have experienced the generosity of God, because they have a culture of honour that outstrips anything I have ever seen in so called 'Christian' Britain and because they believe that those who teach God's word are worthy of double honour (something deeply biblical about that and often forgotten in our churches in the UK).

They may be poor - but they are rich in their kindness. Maybe it is because they do not see their possessions as symbols of their status? Maybe it is because they are more biblical than us. Maybe they are not as caught up with 'stuff' as we are. Maybe they are just more willing to embrace the reality of being the family of God.  There are many reasons why believers I have encountered in other parts of the world are more generous and hospitable than we Christians in Europe.

To be honest, the church in the UK (by and large) has nothing, absolutely nothing, to teach the church in Asia or Africa and or Australasia, or even the USA, about generosity and hospitality. Every single country I have visited over the years has been better at being generous than the UK church. Don;t get me wrong - I am not having a sideways swipe at any church that I have led or lead in the UK. I happen to think that Gold Hill is a kind, generous and open handed community and there is no other place I would rather be and no other local church I would rather lead (I miss you guys sooooo much when I am away). Yet we still have much to learn.

Real generosity - lavish kindness like you see here - is not a stifling, 'we can't afford to be kind', 'don't give them too much' kind of attitude. Real generosity, the kind that opens your eyes in wonder and leaves you speechless in gratitude springs from the conviction that Christ has been lavishly generous to us and so we should be to others. It springs from a deep understanding that it really is more blessed to give than receive. It flows from the belief that the church should be a kind, open-hearted, loving, giving, authentic community that welcomes strangers, provides food for the hungry, water for the thirsty and a warm, whole-hearted welcome to those whom we meet.

Paul told the early church to 'do good to all, especially to those who are of the household of faith'. I think there is something of the early church's true koinonia, genuine oneness and willingness to be a family that we in the West have lost and are losing.  I also think the early church knew how to honour those who taught it, led it, loved it and prayed for it in a way that many of our churches have lost.

I thank God for the ways in which He is ministering to me through the people of Cambodia. I thank God for the church here. I pray I can be as generous in my time and sharing of my gifts with them and others around the world and in the UK as they have been with me.

And I know this - the church here will never out-give the generous, abundant, lavishing kind God that sent His Son for us.

 

A Viral Campaign...

Let's start a viral generosity campaign! Give something away this week. Invite some friends for a meal. Give someone a gift of time, or a cup of coffee or a smile. Bless your church leaders by praying for them. Make sure you honour them financially. Be lavish with God's resources that He has entrusted to you. Who knows - we might just change our communities one life at a time. And the world will be changed when our communities are. Let the church of Jesus be known as the most generous, kind, compassionate people on earth!